Baby Separation Anxiety: When It Starts and Peaks

Many babies begin showing separation anxiety around 6 to 9 months old, when they become more aware that you can leave even though they cannot yet understand when you will return. You might first notice it when you step out of the room, hand your baby to another caregiver, or put them down for sleep; the timing varies, and some babies show little distress.

Separation anxiety often becomes more noticeable between about 10 and 18 months, though there is no single peak age for every child. A baby who was comfortable with a familiar caregiver last month may suddenly protest a goodbye, especially when tired, sick, or adjusting to a new routine; this does not mean you have done anything wrong.

Keep your goodbye warm, brief, and predictable: tell your baby you are leaving, offer a hug, and let the caregiver take over rather than slipping away unnoticed. For a new care arrangement, try short practice separations when possible and give your baby time to get familiar with the caregiver while you are still nearby; a familiar routine can make the transition easier to follow.

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Separation anxiety can come and go through the toddler years, so a difficult week does not necessarily mean every future goodbye will be hard. Our team covers calm goodbyes and secure attachment in A Gentle Guide to Toddler Separation Anxiety; if your child’s distress is intense, persists long after you leave, or disrupts daily life, talk with your pediatrician for guidance suited to your child.